– Undivided –
I don’t see it. I, myself, am completely oblivious of the true reasons why I am the way I am. It’s not that the tiefling’s insanity curse has fallen on me earlier than any other one, no. I would compare myself to clay, red clay. A soft material that can let anyone around shape its form… Yet, clay might still be too stiff compared to my easily manipulated mind. Oh, I’m not stating here that I lack any intellectual ability, nor that I would be innocent like a blonde maiden with wide and blue eyes. I am delusional. It has to be that, maybe? Who knows? You certainly wouldn’t.
You see, even at birth I didn’t enter this world alone. I was with my other half, my twin brother. Perhaps the perfect reflection of everything I was not. He decided that he would take the decisions for the both of us, and I never refused such an offer. In some twisted way, I prefer to follow another’s will, because I think I was robbed from mine since forever. Nothing really interests me in any particular manner… and I don’t hold any special or important goals for myself (outside of plain survival), despite that I might look to be a very ambitious woman. So, I fill this personal emptiness with the will of another, what could be so wrong about it?
———————————————
I still remember that night, sixty years ago, far away among the floating islands of Vahnatia, when my twin brother refused to escape the doomed city with me. There was an ambient panic, every peasant was running around like a headless chicken would, scared that the sky would fall over them due to the destructive storm heading right towards us. Strangely, they were not very far from the truth. The sky -was- falling. Every island collapsed one after the other, and we were next. Fortunately, we had the technology of flying ships that were said to be able to travel between the worlds, even through the Maelstrom.
He refused! He had promised that we would never be separated! And… there I was, taken away from him by the old hag that pretended to be my mother. If I had expressed the shadow of a will, once in my existence, it was at that exact moment. Don’t abandon me! I screamed, but the wind was louder than me. That was all too easy for him! How would I survive without his protection?! How would I fill this terrible terrible emptiness he would leave behind? I’ve never been only one… A raging wave of emotions flooded my mind and I knew that I had lost myself forever, right there, when I saw his silhouette disappear in the crowd.
Elvira (my fake mother) took care of me, I suppose. We even survived the crash of our ship that landed us both in Narrowhaven. Over the years, I collected memories of my long lost brother. Confused memories, true and false, but that I can’t seem to be able to sort properly. One thing is sure, is that I’m making some up. Did he really die on the public place, because of my behavior? Did he really loose his head, by the hand of the Lord of Hatred? I’ve seen him die so many times that perhaps I am not really alive. Still, I wrote to him in my past moments of panic, under the patient stare of the old hag.
Quote:
To Malachite,
It now has been almost sixty years of your absence and still, I can’t seem to find a potent way to erase my single -but deadly- mistake. I’ve tried working alone, like we used to, together, but things only worsened. How could I possibly achieve anything without you? Did you only think, for one second, what would happen to me, once you would be gone? Even the best of us make some “faux pas”, it seems… I am tired. My efforts have pulled me a long way from my life outside society, but never pushed me closer to a solution to my problem. I’ll admit, I’m growing out of patience and even desperate. Since you are not there to level me back, I know I will over react and the consequences will probably be devastating. To hell! What can I do?! I know, I even managed to lie in my writing… but I know you understand my lies.
It has already been done. I’ve found a potential way to bring you back, or at least assure your well-being. I’ve signed a contract with Hatred, and at the end of it, you shall be saved. He’s despicable and backstabbing, but I trust in the nature of the contract. It has to be fulfilled on both sides, just like the ones I seal with my victims. The price is high, but I deserve to suffer for what I have done. I fully accept the problems that will come out of it. Family being Family, and you being my only true one, this is the only rule I will live and die for. Others don’t understand and I don’t expect them to. You, you already understand…
For the first time since you died Malachite, I felt -happy-. Perhaps it is true that you led me there to show me a different side. The best ones are always hidden away. I know now, because you were, back then. I don’t know how this alliance will end up, but I trust it can be a little different, this time. After all, they share the same opinions I have on so many levels, especially about Perfection.
Quote:
Malachite,
I write to you in almost complete darkness. Thankfully, our race has some advantages despite the overall problems it attracts. I will try to sum up the recent events, because I could go on about for pages and pages, without ever writing down the final point. I will at least describe you how it is, so you can imagine where your sister attended some most complicated days.
I have no idea where I am, in fact. I would qualify this place like a random space lost between time and a wretched reality. There are no walls, still, the floor seems to extend only to a certain point, emptiness and void soon replacing the black and ruby tiles. Infinite red curtains seems to flow down upon them, while I can’t even seem to be able to see where they are coming from. The room is furnished with bone-made thrones and tables that support little dark candles that don’t even seem to create any light, despite the dancing flames. They do create shadows, making one feel as if there was more to be seen, behind those crimson drapes and even over the ground’s limits. Oddly enough, I find it beautiful, but I suppose it must be logical since I believe it has been built for me.
Quote:
Malachite,
I’ve comfortably found back the satin sheets of my own bed, yes, exactly the same ones we used to share in our best years. I’ve kept around me more details and memories of you that you would imagine! I almost feel -romantic- about it all, would you even be able to picture that? You used to say how much you thought red complimented me so much, well everything I own (almost!) is that perfect colour, even my garden consists of entirely crimson flowers and plants of all shapes.
The silence of my mansion is softly holding me in safety in those rare moments of appreciated loneliness. The only noise breaking it would be the horrible moans of the fatigued liches. Eternal life must be long, walking around with the undead without any goals or any pleasures of any kind… It reminds me of a woman who seeks it, eternity. How odd? I’m not entirely convinced that she truly knows what she is going for. Once she will discover all the deceptions of the world and slowly sink into bitterness, I highly doubt that she will stay excited about that never ending life. I figure that, over the years, you slowly grow tired and nothing surprises you anymore… death must be attractive, at that point.
See you soon, hopefully.
—————————–
There he was. A different kind of human. A man that I despised from every inch of my soft skin. He saw through it, through me, some of it, more than the others did. Truly. He wanted to lead me back there and help me find what I was looking for. Surprising, Michael Reignes. That arrogant bastard wasn’t that bad after all, perhaps? That old enemy of mine could maybe achieve something for me? Yes, please do. Let’s go there and I’ll be a good companion on the trip…
